Be Strong and Courageous...

... because Jesus Christ is alive!

I've come to realize that it is so easy to fall into the trap of being a hypocrite when writing a blog. I say that because I have a tendency to post about some things happening in my life but not others, and in doing so, I am probably portraying myself to be a better person than I really am. There is a HUGE gap between writing and doing, and ol' nitrox is still struggling mightily with a lot of the things I write about, both in Intentional Discipleship and in Triathlon Training. Suffice it to say that in both areas, I am still sputtering along in a on again, off again fashion, and probably in danger of not finishing the race in both senses (Hebrews 12:1)...

Especially in the area of Intentional Discipleship, I have been consistently allowing the world to come into my heart and steal the unspeakable joy and the unshakable peace that Jesus paid such a high price for. I will spare you the details, but I have been choosing to wallow in self-pity, anger, frustration, even depression, rather than to take hold of the incredible gift of grace from God. I have allowed even the little things in life (e.g. the ol' family mover breaking down when my neighbors are sporting new Mercedes Benz's & Porsche's, falling sick on my 1st week of the new training plan, irrational worries about the merger going on at work, etc...) to displace what should be unshakable and unspeakable.

"Coincidentally" (I am starting to wonder if QT - Quiet Time with the Lord - topics are ever coincidence?) in my QT, I am reading about Moses handing over the reins to Joshua before the Israelites crossed the Jordan over to the promised land. You will remember that Moses was not allowed to cross the Jordan into the promised land, he was allowed only to see it. Why? Because he did not trust God enough (Numbers 20:12) to take control of his emotions. Instead he allowed himself to get angry with the whining of the people, and in anger he struck the stone twice (Numbers 20:11) to get water for the people (when God told him to just speak it, Numbers 20:8).

So when Moses handed over to Joshua, what was the one instruction that was repeated not once, not twice but EIGHT times in the bible's account of Moses and Joshua? You guess it, "Be strong and courageous" - Moses said it to the Israelites (Deuteronomy 31:6), and to Joshua again (Deuteronomy 31:7); God Himself said it to Joshua (Deuteronomy 31:23, Joshua 1:6-7, Joshua 1:9); the Israelites said it to Joshua (Joshua 1:18); and Joshua repeated it to the Israelites (Joshua 10:25). Actually, generations later, even King David encouraged his son King Solomon with the same words (1 Chronicles 22:13, 1 Chronicles 28:20) - we're not even counting these last two occurrences in the eight times. :-) (Just for fun, the phrase "be strong and courageous" is repeated one more time in the bible, anyone know where that is? Hint: Use the search function in BibleGateway.)

I think when a phrase is repeated so many times in the bible, it is probably worth looking at. So why did Moses, Joshua and the Israelites place so much importance on being strong and courageous? And more importantly, how does this exhortation apply today? Well, I think it still takes tremendous courage to choose to keep our eyes on Jesus, and to take hold of the freedom/victory that He gives us by doing the "right" thing despite pressing circumstances. As I look back in the past few weeks (and much beyond) I know that I have chosen in weakness and cowardice to wallow in self-pity, anger, and frustration, instead of being brave enough to to take the high road and do the "right" thing. A current example may be ol' nitrox choosing to worry about my job security/scope, choosing to assume that management is lost in politics and/or empire building, rather than choosing to find my security in Jesus, and trusting Him enough to be the voice of re-assurance and hope in the midst of the merger at work. In doing so, I have lost yet another opportunity God has given me to be a witness at work.

I believe God, in His infinite wisdom and love, has already prepared/supplied everything we need to do the "right" thing everytime. The only uncertainty in the whole equation is our free will - He is gracious enough to respect what we choose, even if it means that sometimes we choose to give up the precious freedom/victory that He has bought for us. So one way to look at it is that all we need to do is be strong and courageous enough to choose His way, and He will do the rest.

Perhaps another way of looking at it is that fear is the anti-thesis of faith. For some who live where there is no religious freedom (and there continues to be many such places right here in Asia), this is the very real fear of reprisals, social exclusion and even grievous bodily harm to family and self in the midst of persecution. For ol' nitrox, it is ultimately the fear that what God has promised just ain't good enough - I know that God has promised unshakable peace and unspeakable joy, but I really don't think I can be happy without my current job/pay, without a shiny new sports car, without "respectable" timings in my 1st O.D. Tri, etc... Crazy but true. My co-leader in Care Group once said that when we sin, we are really choosing to find happiness/peace by our own means. Like the early Israelites who made for themselves a golden calf when Moses was in Mt Sinai talking to God (Exodus 32:1), we are taking things into our own hands, and finding peace and joy in what we can create/control. The end result is always that we find the end point less than fulfilling, because we are trying to fill a "God-shaped" hole in our hearts with something that we fashioned with our hands.

Today, I choose to be strong and courageous. I choose joy and peace, and I hope you do too. Until next time, train safe and God Speed!

Freaking Out

Sorry for the picture quality - that's a dragon fly on Mrs Nitrox's finger that has R1 & R2 freaking out. Sigh, I am the father of 2 true blue city kids... :-)

Sorry also for freaking about the 17 weeks to my 1st O.D. Triathlon. What can I say? It's been a rough week by all counts... (By the way, if you have any advice for my O.D. Tri Training Plan, I would very much appreciate it!)

• One of our pastors (whom I have come to dearly love and respect) had a terrible family tragedy, and all we could do was pray for him and give him a hug...
• The HUGE merger at work is now underway, and there is STILL no news about what our roles are in the new company months from the start of planning. As expected, some folks have been busily building "empires" while the new organisation is being formed, and it really ilks me that the rest of us seem to be at the receiving end of their posturing and "land grabbing". I KNOW God is working to prepare the path ahead for me (just as He has always done), but my lack of faith makes the journey more than a little unsettling. What a clear example of the difference between HEAD knowledge and HEART knowledge! Lord, help my unbelief and restore me to the fullness of life in accordance with Your perfect will!
• On the training end, I finally had a break through last Sunday in the 50km bike / 5km run - for the 1st time ever, I actually felt strong on the bike AND the run, and got some respectable timings. And then the very next day, the familiar "runny nose, sore throat, cough" feeling came back. Sigh, what a let down! :-( It's been stressful since then trying to toe the fine line between meeting my training commitment and getting enough rest to fend off another full-blown infection. Not a good thing to start my 17 week plan by missing work-outs, but it looks like this is exactly what's gonna happen.

However, in spite of the cloudy skies, I have been totally OVER-WHELMED by the outpouring of love, advice and encouragement from all of you via comments and email in reponse to my shameless plea for help - Thank You RobTheRunner, Tri-Mama, IronPol, PapaLouie, NancyToby, Cliff, Tryathlete, Tammy, IronJenny, Wylee, Tri-Dummy, Lisa, Annette, Commodore, TriFeist, Flatman, and other kind bloggers who have yet to offer wise words to my O.D. Tri Training Plan. Thanks again guys/gals, you really made my week!

Quite a few of you reminded me that I did not state my goal for the OSIM 2007 Triathlon in my last post. Well, it was semi-intentional. ;-) My timing for the last Sprint I did end 2005 was swim 21:36, bike 41:56, run 32:22 (inclusive of transitions) so I figure that I should aim for 2 X my Sprint timing which would take in account the on/off training I did in 2006. So my goal for OSIM 2007 is swim 40mins, bike 1:30, run 1:05 for a total of 3:15, which at this stage looks pretty much like a S-T-R-E-T-C-H target. So there it is, I have publicly declared my time target, now it's SERIOUS BUSINESS. :-)

Some initial thoughts/changes to my training plan after all that great feedback:

• My original plan is probably too ambitious, will have to scale down the distances somewhat and accept the fact that I will probably miss some sessions due to travel, family, etc...
• TriFeist reminded me that my ambitious Saturday bike/run distances will take a LONG time - I had forgotten to take training time per session into consideration. Duh... So some weeks I'll do 60-70km bike/5km run, and other weeks do 40km bike/10-12km run. I'll probably keep it random based on how I feel. I hear it is good to shock the body sometimes. :)
• Will limit run intervals to 1km or so and increase speed and/or number of repeats progressively. Will also introduce some stride work as suggested by IronPol. I also like Tryathlete's idea of running 2.4km time trials (like in the army).
• Will try to increase my long run and long swim distances - I think I'll need that extra boost of confidence come race day.
• Cliff made time during his vacation in Hong Kong to give me some pretty specific advice. My favourite being to week one in each 3 week training block with a lower volume and progressively add until rest week. I like that idea very much, my previous plan to rack up the mileage from week one was probably a little too unrealistic.
• I am also seriously looking at how I can insert a mid-week bike ride, maybe in place of a strength training session. Hmmm....

So it's obvious that the training plan needs more work and I will try to put up a revised plan this weekend. Meanwhile, train safe and God Speed! I will be going for Maundy Thurs service tonight and going to bed straight after, hoping to wake up feeling good enough to go for my missed 12km run.

Happy Easter everyone! Remember that Christ died to buy us fullness of life, so don't let the world rob you of the freedom you already have!

HELP! 17 weeks to My 1st Olympic Distance Triathlon!

Okay, here's where the rubber hits the road... I have only 17 weeks to my 1st Olympic Distance Triathlon and something akin to panic is just about setting in...

Been trying to put together some sort of training plan, and discovered that I have SO MANY questions! I have been reading Joe Friel's book and also the "12 weeks to a Olympic Distance PR" series of articles in the last 2 issues of Triathlete Magazine, but it seems the more I read, the more confused I become! So I am rather desperately appealing to the collective wisdom of the athelete's in blogsphere to PLEASE give me some pointers.

First my current state:

• 3-4 kgs above my target race weight of 80kg/176lbs (1.85m/6ft), which shows up in the embarassing bulges above and below my cycling tights. :-(
• The "W13" (Week 13) row in the table below shows what I did last week.I am reasonably confident of completing the O.D. Tri, but I think I need to work on both my endurance and speed.
• In the area of endurance, I probably need to focus on the run (longest run yet prior to falling sick was only 12km).
• In the area of speed, my 1.5km swim is about 40mins, 50km ride (flat course) takes just short of 2 hours, and I need something like 1:10 to run 10km, and we are talking about doing each event FRESH. :-(

My current plan:

• Taking into account the training time I have, I will aim for 2 X swim, 3 X run, 1 x bike, 2 x strength training a week.
• For the swim and run, I will have a intervals or drills session per week to build speed, and one aerobic session per week to build endurance.
• I intend to keep it simple and make a rough weekly plan as follows:
  Mon: Run (Intervals), Strength Training
  Tues: Swim (Aerobic)
  Wed: Run (Aerobic)
  Thurs: Strength Training
  Fri: Swim (Drills/Intervals - will alternate between the two, drills one week and intervals the next)
  Sat: Bike/Run (Brick)
  Sun: Rest
• With the amount of travelling in my job, there will probably be more than a little shifting and doubling up missed work-outs.

The table below shows my targeted distances:

And now finally, my long list of questions:

1. Do the Run:Interval distances look right to you? Should I be doing anything longer than 3km x 4 Intervals for an Olympic Distance Tri?
2. Do the Bike and Run:Brick distances look right to you? Do I need to go beyond 64km rides for an Olympic Distance Tri? How about the run? I was thinking that running 12km after my ride will help boost my confidence to finish the event...
3. Should I be focusing more on repeating bricks in the last week - i.e. instead of 64km bike / 12 km run, should I be doing 20km bike / 5 km run X 3?
4. Is it a good idea to do a full mock race (i.e. 1.5km swim / 40km bike / 10km run)? If so, when's a good time to do that?
5. Do the Run:Aerobic distances look right to you? Should I be doing more than 15km for an Olympic Distance event?
6. Do the Swim:Aerobic distances look right to you? Should I be doing more than 2km or so for an Okympic Distance event"?
7. What am I supposed to do in the rest weeks? Do I do the same number of sessions (i.e. 3 runs, 2 swims, 1 bike, 2 strength) and reduce the intensity/distance in each, or do I allow myself to miss a few sessions (e.g. instead of 3 runs, do only 2 but at the same target distances as a training week)?
8. What am I supposed to do in the taper weeks? Is 2 weeks for taper too much or too little?

Sorry to be inundating you with all these questions, but please forgive the procastinations of this middle-aged Novice Master Triathlete and share some of your valuable insights with me and other would-be triathletes out there!

While I am at it, please allow me one LAST question. :-) This here is ol' nitrox's steed: a Scott CR1 Team, full carbon frame road bike which came standard with Shimano 105 group set and Mavic Ksyrium Equipe wheels. As pictured, I have added a zero off-set seat post, Arione Tri saddle, and a Deda clip-on bar since getting it in Sep 2005. I've been thinking of giving myself some extra motivatin for the O.D. Tri, so here's the question: What is a better investment? Upgrading my 105 group to Ultegra, or getting a pair of 'em sexy Flash-Point FP60 wheels?

Thanks again Guys & Gals, and until next time, train safe and God Speed!

Character Building Week

Sorry, I am reporting late on the week past again, and yes, it was a "character building" week. You know those weeks where you come back from being away from training and it takes an extra effort to get out the door, and even more effort to finish the tail end of the workout? That's been my week. "Character building" sounds a lot betta than "painful", doesn't it? :-)

• Mon: Still recovering from the last virus attack
• Tues: I knew it would be painful character building getting back, so decided to jump in the deep end and start with intervals in the office gym - only managed to do 4 of the 5 planned 1km intervals.
• Wed: Just in case there is more character building I have to get out of my system, I did a 10km run. Yes, it was slow and uncomfortable, but I got it done.
• Thurs: In Indonesia, and I rested.
• Fri: In Indonesia, but managed to get in some character building strength training in the hotel gym on Fri morning.
• Sat: Family day, so I went for a very easy bike ride with R1 & R2. This time, R2 decided to ride his own bike with training wheels (instead of being ferried on my bike) and got a good workout in the 7km or so ride. R1 claims that he did not even really work up a sweat. :)
• Sun: 50km ride / 5km run. This was easily the highlight of the week. I have steadfastly refused to name my bike, but I am starting to understand why many do, because I was so proud of my steed - we caught up with a young guy riding a Cervelo P3C and managed to keep up with him! Sure, he kept pulling away but we kept catching him at the lights. ;-) Not often that I can say that about someone half my age (okay, maybe 2/3) riding a bike that costs twice as much as mine, so I'll take life's little victories as they come. :-D

While on the subject of character building, my car got towed to the workshop for the second time in 7 months. :-( Seems it is the clutch this time as the transmission was slipping very badly. The mechanic was kind enough to let me use a flaming red Mazda 3 in the meantime - it sure is humbling to see the Nitrox clan getting excited to exchange the family mover to the loaner. ;-) I am bracing myself for when I have to tell R2 that we are returning the shiny new car...

In the same vein, I have had to return my flashy test phone as it has now been productised. So there may be no more kewl pics from me for a while until I get my paws on another test phone.

OK, that's probably enough "character building" news for now. Until next time, train safe and God Speed!

So Why Intentional Discipleship?

When I started this blog in 2005, I wrote long, winding posts like Intentional Discipleships and Triathlon Training, and So What's the Deal with Intentional Discipleships, but I don't think I ever articulated in clear succint terms what is Intentional Discipleship and why it is so important to me. So in the spirit of the "never say die" attitude in triathlon training, here's another go:

1. I believe that Christianity is a process and not just a point of accepting Christ, because Christianity is about having a relationship with God, and the point of accepting Christ is just the start of this relationship.
   


2. In order to have a healthy relationship with God, I believe that we need to have Intentional Discipleship in three crucial disciplines: prayer, reading His Word and honouring Him by how we live- i.e. how we treat ourselves (body and soul) and how we treat those around us. Hence the similarity between Intentional Discipleship with Triathlon Training where we have to constantly balance the three disciplines of swim, bike and run. Which explains my facination with Intentional Discipleship & Triathlon Training, and hence the title of this blog. :)
   


3. At this point, some may object and remind me that it is purely by God's grace alone that we are saved. We are not able to do anything to save ourselves. They are absolutely right! In fact, it is a sin to even try to earn our salvation through works because only God can save. The crucial point here is the definition of salvation, and I believe that if we define salvation to be just entry into heaven and eternal life (as astounding as that is), we might have missed the fullness of God's incredible grace. I believe that Jesus came to give us fullness of life as He intended it to be (John 10:10), and the best part is that the offer starts now, not just when we go to heaven! And I believe that to unlock this fullness of life, we have to know Him in a very real and intimate way. We simply cannot learn from someone we do not know, respect and meet with regularly - hence the importance of Intentional Discipleship to get to know Him more and more. So in short, I don't believe that Intentional Discipleship saves my soul, but I believe it to be the key that enables me to start having fullness of life even now when I am still on earth.

And that's why Intentional Discipleship is so important to me. It is my prayer that somehow, we can journey together and learn together, and together unlock the fullness of life that Jesus has designed for you and me.

Train safe and may God Speed our journey of discovering the fullness of life!

Zero Training Week

Yup, it's been 10 days with ZERO training and counting...

By any measure of the world, this week has been a wash-out. It was the one week mid-term school break, but the entire Nitrox clan has been down with the flu bug all week. (Okay, technically it is a viral attack and not an infection, and hence not the flu as such, but ...) It started on Monday with Mrs Nitrox having high fever and R2 having cough/runny nose, slight fever and vormitting. By mid week, R1 got it bad - high fever off and on for 2 days(despite Panadol and Ibuprofen), totally clogged up (had spells of difficulty breathing - R1 has histroy of asthma), and the runs. My symptoms also got serious enough to warrant two days of medical leave.

BUT, as Mrs Nitrox and I were just musing, if we do NOT use the measure of the world, it actually turned out to be a pretty good week, and we have so much to be thankful for:

1. If Mrs Nitrox and the kids had to get sick for a week, it's probably better to have happened in the week of school holiday then a school week. It would have been too much hassle and pressure otherwise - re-arranging for car-pool to school, getting medical leave for R1 and then helping him catch up with school work afterwards (yes, we get school work even at Primary/Elementary school in Singapore), stressing out about how much school the boys are missing, etc...
2. R1 and R2 are blessed with "peds" (doctors) who really love kids, and who are also close friends in church. So quite literally, instead of getting antibiotics for the viral infection, we get good medical advice, prayers and follow-up calls to check out how the kids are doing! Thanks Dr(s) TK & Dawn, you truly are a blessing!
3. We are blessed with a Care Group who PRAYS, and prayers always help!
4. I got to spend just about the entire week with the kids, and for someone who travels so much as part of my job, this was a huge bonus. Mrs Nitrox was sick in the initial part of the week, and had a Sunday School retreat over the weekend, so I got the boys ALL TO MYSELF pretty much for the whole week. Yup, it was a little stressful at first coping with 2 grouchy sick boys, but I felt that the 3 of us really BONDED this week. Best part is, I only used up 2 days of Annual Leave (the other 2 days were Medical Leave). :-)
5. In retrospect, R1 and R2 did get to do most of what they wanted to this week - not much schoolwork at all and lots of play and rest time. :-) We napped a lot, acted silly, flew paper airplanes, rode our bikes, watched "Open Season" & "Happy Feet", played "Battleships", bought some kewl new toys, and generally had loads of fun together.

PRAISE GOD!

Well, it's back to school for the boys and back to work for me tomorrow. I'm praying that we get over the tail end of this virus attack real soon and things get back to normal. For me, this means a "back on the saddle" week after almost 2 weeks of no training at all. From experience, it would be slow and probably quite painful... I'm looking forward to it! :-)

Until next time, train safe ya'all and God Speed!

Hair Spray

Confession time: Ol' Nitrox is follically challenged, and I have been carrying with me a travel sized pump action hair spray dutifully in all my travels, believing that if I keep at it, one day, beautifully healthy hair would start growing again. (If only we were as consistent with our medication/treatments as our Quiet Time with the Lord - but that's another story.)

A few weeks ago, the hair spray got clogged up somehow. It would work once or twice, and then the whole thing would get clogged out. I would then dutifully take the spray bottle apart, clean out the spray mechanism, assemble the whole thing, only to have it work for one spray and then get clogged all over again. Some nights I do the whole dissemble/clean/assemble process 3 times a night just to get some of that precious fluid on my bald pate. All the while, feeling frustrated with the bottle, and more than a little unhappy that more of the precious fluid is literally going down the drain than onto my head. :-(

Last night, I noticed another similar bottle on the counter top, so I picked it up, and hey presto, the new bottle worked just fine. The sense of satisfaction that I got from having the new bottle freely spray the precious stuff onto my head is simply beyond words - I went to bed with a smile on my face, amazed at how a simple thing like a working spray bottle can make or break my night. (Okay, so I don't have much of a life, but that's also another story.) Just then, it ocurred to me that in a lot of ways, I am like that blasted clogged up spray bottle. As a child of God, I am filled with His love and Spirit, but my efforts to share His love through ministry are like the impotent putterings of the clogged spray bottle!

When I started out as an ursher in church, it was all great and rosey, but after some months, I started dreading my ministry. It came to a point when I contemplated switching church so I would not have to ursher! Then when R1 & R2 were toddlers, I started serving in the Toddler's Playgroup in church. It was great at first, the kids and I had a lot of fun, some of the parents were amazed that a father would bother to come and teach the toddlers (it's still very Asian for the fathers to leave parenting to the moms). But now that R1 & R2 have both "graduated" into the kindergarden classes, I catch myself wishing sometimes that I could stop serving at the Playgroup. Some of you know I lead a Care Group, and when we were doing a structured Intentional Discipleship program last year, it was great - I learnt lots and looked forward to Care Group meetings. But nowadays, I catch myself wishing sometimes that I was just a member...

So in my service, I am like the clogged up spray bottle. Imagine God's frustration that each time He would take the time and effort to "clean" me out, just so that I would work like I should only once or twice before it happens all over again. Wouldn't be long before He finds another spray bottle that is working fine, and I miss out on being used by Him. What a scary thought! I guess the lesson here is really to guard my heart against the euphoria and drudgery of service - both are just as dangerous, because both may be symptoms of serving for the wrong reasons. Just as in Cain and Abel, God looks at the giver and not the gift. When our eyes are not on the Lord, we cannot please Him with our service. Conversely, when our eyes are on Him, we cannot but please Him. It really is as simple as that!

Talking about being clogged up, the Nitrox clan is pretty clogged up with the flu. Mrs Nitrox has got high fever, and R2 is all clogged up and has a bit of difficulty holding his food down. R1 and I are both having some of the runny nose, scratchy throat symptoms ourselves. So the planned 50km ride / 4km run last weekend got canned, and I did what all cyclists do when they cannot ride - I brought my bike for some much needed tuning and then cleaned my bike. (Don't let the WD-40 scare you, I spray it on as a chain cleaner, dry it, and then lubricate with the expensive Teflon chain lubricant.) :)

• Tues (6/3): 11.8km run (longest run yet!)
• Wed (7/3): Strength Training in office gym - Leg Press, Seated Row, Bent Elbow Lat Pulldown, Push Ups, Ab Crunch with Twist.
• Thurs (8/3): Intervals on office gym threadmill - 1 km warm up, 3 X (1km run, 500m jog), 2 X (1.5km run, 500m jog)
• Fri (9/3): 1.65km swim
• Sat (10/3): 7km fun ride with R1 & R2 (R1 is the grouchy one - R2 is happy as he got to be a passenger on my bike) :-)

This week is school holidays week, so I am taking some time off work to take care of R1 & R2, especially when Mrs Nitrox is down with the flu. Looks like will be a light training week for me then. Until next time, train safe and God Speed!